The key to everything in life is love. Love the people around you, love yourself, love life, love nature, love progress, love well-being; this is love. Because if you love a child, you'll do everything you can to help them develop. I think we over-complicate things a lot of the time. I think what's truly valuable is incredibly simple. I also believe that everything slots into place if we apply the following four principles: love people, believe in them, value them and encourage them. If we don't love people, or believe in, value or encourage them, things can turn out very different.
People who can't stabilize their moods, for example, who wake up not feeling like doing anything, but can't shake the mood they're in, or who feel angry but don't know how to channel their anger positively or successfully, or who are scared but can't overcome their fear, will find it hard to move forward in life. A person who doesn't know how to understand others or how to resolve conflicts will find it difficult to progress in life. IQ tests don't measure these two types of intelligence. They also don't measure other types of intelligence such as musical, kinesthetic, naturalist and spiritual intelligence. If you study the relationship between success in life in a broad sense and IQ, you'll see that, effectively, a substantial amount of people who have been successful do not score highly in IQ tests. Perhaps we have to redefine what success is. This is very encouraging as it expands our idea of intelligence (although, IQ is still important of course). What we need to do is create multiple profiles in order to reflect the idea that a peacock is no better or worse than a golden eagle. If a child is aware that they process information differently to other people, their self-esteem won't be damaged as long as they feel valued and intelligent. Self-esteem is important as, more often than not, our ability or inability to deal with challenges is governed by our psychological perception of ourselves rather than factors that exist in the real world. Children will eventually find their way, but only if they believe they have the capacity to do so.
It's not easy for parents to teach their children how to be brave because we love them so much that our fear that something might happen to them, that they'll suffer or have difficulties, often makes us over-protective. It's important to understand that it's normal for a child to get a few bumps and scrapes, to be frustrated and to experience pain. Sometimes we wrap them up in cotton wool to try to protect them and stop them from suffering, but this prevents them from growing. Really, what we need to do is value them, challenge them to help them grow and help them so they don't feel they have to face challenges alone. All humans face challenges, and some children are very fearful of this. In reality, the real world is much more benevolent than the psychological world. We have to try to see fear as a companion that we need in order to grow, rather than as an opponent.